1 00:00:49,674 --> 00:00:51,295 Fuck! 2 00:00:54,429 --> 00:00:56,848 Siri, call Shithead. 3 00:01:02,896 --> 00:01:03,896 Good morning. 4 00:01:03,981 --> 00:01:06,861 There is nothing in The Sun about Ted and Keeley. 5 00:01:06,942 --> 00:01:08,861 Nothing. Are you in your office? 6 00:01:08,944 --> 00:01:10,153 Of course I am. 7 00:01:10,236 --> 00:01:11,236 Then get up here now. 8 00:01:13,448 --> 00:01:15,367 Bye, boys. Tell Mum I love her. 9 00:01:16,284 --> 00:01:18,194 Knock, knock. Hey, boss, I don't know about you, 10 00:01:18,287 --> 00:01:20,746 but I had an absolute peach of a Sunday. 11 00:01:20,831 --> 00:01:21,831 Here you go. 12 00:01:23,709 --> 00:01:25,248 Yeah, finally saw Big Ben. 13 00:01:25,335 --> 00:01:27,585 Boy, I thought I'd seen the biggest clock there was. 14 00:01:27,670 --> 00:01:29,420 When I was a kid, my folks took me 15 00:01:29,506 --> 00:01:32,006 to the Allen-Bradley Clock Tower up there in Milwaukee. 16 00:01:32,091 --> 00:01:33,819 They ended up leaving me there all by myself. 17 00:01:33,843 --> 00:01:36,764 Yeah, three hours and 42 minutes. You know how I know that? 18 00:01:36,847 --> 00:01:38,137 You were staring at a clock? 19 00:01:38,222 --> 00:01:40,576 I was staring at a clock. That's exactly right. Yeah, bingo. 20 00:01:40,600 --> 00:01:41,870 That's a little bit of a mystery puzzle. 21 00:01:41,894 --> 00:01:43,454 You figured it out right away. You're a sharp cookie. 22 00:01:43,478 --> 00:01:44,478 - Ted. - Yeah. 23 00:01:44,563 --> 00:01:46,902 Speaking as we were mere moments ago, about time, 24 00:01:46,981 --> 00:01:48,692 I unfortunately don't have any. 25 00:01:48,775 --> 00:01:50,564 I have a branding meeting, so... 26 00:01:51,110 --> 00:01:52,531 I always feel so bad for the cows, 27 00:01:52,612 --> 00:01:54,783 but you gotta do it otherwise they get lost. 28 00:01:59,118 --> 00:02:00,118 That was a branding joke. 29 00:02:00,203 --> 00:02:01,504 If we were in Kansas right now, 30 00:02:01,579 --> 00:02:04,250 I'd just be sitting here waiting for you to finish laughing. Yeah. 31 00:02:05,292 --> 00:02:06,501 I'll see ya tomorrow, okay? 32 00:02:06,584 --> 00:02:09,455 - Okay. Counting the minutes. - Yeah, there you are. 33 00:02:30,901 --> 00:02:34,401 All right. Let's see what we got here. I've got this fella up here, the goalie. 34 00:02:34,487 --> 00:02:36,658 Then all these guys over here, okay? 35 00:02:36,740 --> 00:02:39,409 And going over here, going over that way. 36 00:02:40,326 --> 00:02:42,326 This son of a gun's gonna go all the way down here. 37 00:02:45,206 --> 00:02:47,627 Crystal Palace kicked our booties last week. 38 00:02:48,252 --> 00:02:50,711 And this here, is our current offense that we are running, 39 00:02:50,795 --> 00:02:52,876 and I think it stinks! 40 00:02:54,049 --> 00:02:55,338 Get rid of it. 41 00:02:57,593 --> 00:03:01,644 Now, you might be wondering why'd I draw all that up there just to erase it. 42 00:03:01,723 --> 00:03:03,853 And that is because I believe in symbolic gestures. 43 00:03:04,560 --> 00:03:05,689 As do I. 44 00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:08,110 What time did you get home last night? 45 00:03:08,771 --> 00:03:10,572 - Didn't. - Really? 46 00:03:11,733 --> 00:03:14,073 Now, look, our whole offense right now is all give-and-go. 47 00:03:14,151 --> 00:03:16,662 Give the ball to Jamie and everyone else can go to hell. 48 00:03:16,737 --> 00:03:19,578 So, I am officially on the prowl for any new ideas, you hear? 49 00:03:22,286 --> 00:03:23,615 - You got something, Nate? - No. 50 00:03:24,746 --> 00:03:25,996 So... 51 00:03:26,080 --> 00:03:28,330 No. No. God, no. Never mind, I'm sorry. 52 00:03:28,417 --> 00:03:30,978 Come on now. You're one of us. Let's go. Fire away. What do you got? 53 00:03:31,002 --> 00:03:33,712 Okay, right. Well, it's just... No, other pocket. 54 00:03:33,796 --> 00:03:35,586 It's just something that I thought of. 55 00:03:37,425 --> 00:03:39,135 Sorry. Jesus. 56 00:03:39,802 --> 00:03:41,052 Not that one. 57 00:03:41,138 --> 00:03:43,268 You know what, it's not even very good. 58 00:03:43,348 --> 00:03:45,388 It's probably really bad. It's embarrassing even. 59 00:03:45,474 --> 00:03:46,474 - I just... - Sorry, Nate. 60 00:03:46,560 --> 00:03:49,439 I have a real tricky time hearing folks that don't believe in themselves. 61 00:03:49,478 --> 00:03:50,789 I'm gonna ask you real quick again. 62 00:03:50,813 --> 00:03:52,944 - Do you think this idea will work? - Yeah, I do. 63 00:03:53,942 --> 00:03:56,031 - Why you screaming at us, Nate? - God! 64 00:03:56,110 --> 00:03:57,700 We're right here. 65 00:03:58,155 --> 00:03:59,985 All right, come on now. Walk us through it. 66 00:04:00,782 --> 00:04:03,201 Okay. So, I thought if we started the attack on the wing, 67 00:04:03,284 --> 00:04:04,615 Jamie could run through nearside, 68 00:04:04,703 --> 00:04:07,413 then when the defense follows, Sam could fill his spot. 69 00:04:07,497 --> 00:04:09,247 So, use Jamie as a decoy? 70 00:04:09,332 --> 00:04:10,332 No. 71 00:04:11,126 --> 00:04:14,165 No. Well, yeah, in... Yeah, in this case, yes. 72 00:04:15,046 --> 00:04:16,336 Let's give it a shot. 73 00:04:18,175 --> 00:04:19,401 What, you're gonna use my play? 74 00:04:19,425 --> 00:04:21,636 Yeah. I mean, we're gonna try it on, see if it fits. 75 00:04:21,720 --> 00:04:23,060 You know, it might not. 76 00:04:23,137 --> 00:04:25,927 Then again, it might be a very flattering silhouette, 77 00:04:26,016 --> 00:04:27,805 and I might wear it right outta the store. 78 00:04:27,893 --> 00:04:29,653 Makes me feel good and I start to strut. 79 00:04:30,353 --> 00:04:32,903 I'm like, "I like this. I like the way this makes me feel." 80 00:04:32,980 --> 00:04:34,271 Show him your strut, Coach. 81 00:04:34,358 --> 00:04:37,187 Yeah, there you go. Oh, yeah. Yep, that's how to strut. 82 00:04:37,276 --> 00:04:38,817 Let me see you strut, Nate. Come on. 83 00:04:40,197 --> 00:04:42,132 There you go, Nate. Yeah, that's one way to do it. 84 00:04:42,156 --> 00:04:43,276 There you go. 85 00:04:44,076 --> 00:04:45,677 You look a little angry, but that's all right. 86 00:04:45,701 --> 00:04:47,430 That's my fault. I forgot the pitch is right this way. 87 00:04:47,454 --> 00:04:48,932 Come on, let's go. Strut this way. Here we go. 88 00:04:48,956 --> 00:04:50,115 Still strutting. 89 00:04:50,206 --> 00:04:51,997 - I'll see you later. Yeah. - Yeah. 90 00:04:54,127 --> 00:04:56,507 Ted! Hey, have you got a minute? 91 00:04:56,588 --> 00:04:59,677 - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Everything okay? - Yeah, yeah. No, it's fine, yeah. 92 00:05:02,261 --> 00:05:04,850 - It's not fine. Everything's shit. - Oh, no. 93 00:05:04,930 --> 00:05:07,310 This was gonna be the front page of The Sun today. 94 00:05:07,391 --> 00:05:09,310 "Manager Shags Star Player's Girlfriend." 95 00:05:10,060 --> 00:05:11,769 I think a more accurate headline would be, 96 00:05:11,853 --> 00:05:15,574 "Manager Innocently Feeds Young Woman Whose Relationship Does Not Define Her." 97 00:05:15,649 --> 00:05:17,149 Ted, this is really bad! 98 00:05:17,233 --> 00:05:20,324 Except I look insanely fit in this picture. 99 00:05:21,404 --> 00:05:23,064 Yeah, no, it's beautiful light. 100 00:05:23,156 --> 00:05:25,802 My friend who works at the paper said he can hold this story for one day 101 00:05:25,826 --> 00:05:27,196 as a favor. 102 00:05:27,286 --> 00:05:30,536 When this shit hits, Jamie is going to go mental. 103 00:05:30,622 --> 00:05:32,141 There's going to be photographers all over us. 104 00:05:32,165 --> 00:05:32,995 Right, right. 105 00:05:33,082 --> 00:05:34,963 The next picture of me will not be this perfect. 106 00:05:35,043 --> 00:05:37,423 I am gonna be mid-sneeze face, like... 107 00:05:40,882 --> 00:05:42,762 - Guess what the headline will be. - Gesundheit? 108 00:05:42,800 --> 00:05:45,011 "Jamie's Tart Breaks Tartt's Heart." 109 00:05:45,762 --> 00:05:47,432 - Did you just come up with that? - Yeah. 110 00:05:47,514 --> 00:05:49,644 - Everyone would read that. - Of course they would. 111 00:05:49,725 --> 00:05:52,077 You have no idea the power of rhyming in this goddamn country. 112 00:05:52,101 --> 00:05:53,151 Yeah. 113 00:05:53,228 --> 00:05:55,858 "Lasso Makes Passo and Creates Team Fiasco." 114 00:05:56,773 --> 00:05:57,942 Keeley's got bars. 115 00:05:58,024 --> 00:06:01,024 Yeah, I'm cute as a button and I can rhyme my ass off. 116 00:06:01,987 --> 00:06:03,906 God, it's no wonder they want to destroy me. 117 00:06:04,781 --> 00:06:05,911 Yeah, yeah. 118 00:06:12,581 --> 00:06:14,461 Sorry, it took me so long to get up the stairs. 119 00:06:14,540 --> 00:06:18,550 I was... stopped to talk by about a hundred people. 120 00:06:18,629 --> 00:06:19,959 Still nothing. 121 00:06:20,047 --> 00:06:22,086 Get someone to run the story about Ted and Keeley. 122 00:06:23,257 --> 00:06:26,677 - Hey, boss. - Ted! And Keeley. Hello. 123 00:06:26,762 --> 00:06:29,012 Hey, I found that in the hall. Yeah. 124 00:06:29,096 --> 00:06:31,096 So, we got ourselves a situation here. 125 00:06:31,182 --> 00:06:32,733 Go ahead, show her the picture, yeah. 126 00:06:33,393 --> 00:06:36,403 See? And the fucking Sun is running it tomorrow. 127 00:06:36,480 --> 00:06:37,689 Honestly, these people, 128 00:06:37,773 --> 00:06:40,653 they just have no regard for people's privacy and dignity. 129 00:06:40,733 --> 00:06:44,324 Yeah, I'm gonna find the piece of shit that took this and who hired them. 130 00:06:44,403 --> 00:06:45,913 No, no. Not necessary. 131 00:06:45,988 --> 00:06:49,369 I know the owner of the paper. I can get this stopped with a phone call. 132 00:06:50,494 --> 00:06:52,913 Really? Oh, my God. Thank you. 133 00:06:52,995 --> 00:06:54,245 See, what I tell ya, huh? 134 00:06:54,331 --> 00:06:57,211 This woman right here is strong, confident and powerful. 135 00:06:57,292 --> 00:07:00,211 Boss, I tell ya, I'd hate to see you and Michelle Obama arm wrestle, 136 00:07:00,295 --> 00:07:02,314 but I wouldn't be able to take my eyes off it either. 137 00:07:02,338 --> 00:07:04,088 That's not a compliment I've had before. 138 00:07:04,757 --> 00:07:08,007 - You do have perfect action figure-y arms. - Yeah. 139 00:07:08,470 --> 00:07:11,139 There's another one. Anyway, glad to help. 140 00:07:11,223 --> 00:07:13,103 - All right. Yeah. - Thank you. 141 00:07:13,182 --> 00:07:15,353 - Okay. - See y'all later. 142 00:07:17,103 --> 00:07:19,463 There's no way she can trace that photo back to me, can she? 143 00:07:19,564 --> 00:07:21,394 - Yes. - What do you mean "yes"? 144 00:07:22,192 --> 00:07:24,192 Did you not use an alias or a burner phone? 145 00:07:24,278 --> 00:07:29,577 I'm not a spy, Rebecca. I'm just the director of football operations. 146 00:07:29,658 --> 00:07:31,737 And equally proficient at both. 147 00:07:31,826 --> 00:07:34,536 Well, thank you. Wait... 148 00:07:35,997 --> 00:07:38,707 Okay, here we go. Sam lays it for Dickson. 149 00:07:38,792 --> 00:07:39,792 Okay, nice touch. 150 00:07:42,086 --> 00:07:43,877 Switch to Bumbercatch. 151 00:07:44,338 --> 00:07:46,548 Jamie decoys through. 152 00:07:46,632 --> 00:07:48,762 - Sam wide open. - There it is! 153 00:07:56,435 --> 00:07:58,185 Nice play, Nate. How you feel? 154 00:07:58,269 --> 00:08:01,519 I just don't know. So many new feelings. Yeah. 155 00:08:01,607 --> 00:08:03,084 Kinda like getting your first pube, right? 156 00:08:03,108 --> 00:08:04,148 - Yeah. What? - Here we go. 157 00:08:04,567 --> 00:08:06,947 All right. Hey. Nice work. 158 00:08:07,028 --> 00:08:08,028 Okay, now, gentlemen, 159 00:08:08,112 --> 00:08:09,673 here's the other thing we're gonna start focusing on. 160 00:08:09,697 --> 00:08:11,908 Making quicker transitions from offense to defense. 161 00:08:11,992 --> 00:08:15,122 Y'all gotta start making your hellos goodbyes. You understand? 162 00:08:15,204 --> 00:08:17,254 Easiest way to get that done well is to do it well. 163 00:08:17,331 --> 00:08:20,081 But aside from that, you gotta be in great shape, right? 164 00:08:20,167 --> 00:08:23,127 So, we are all gonna run two laps around this field. 165 00:08:23,211 --> 00:08:26,552 Anyone who loses to me has to run four more. Let's go! 166 00:08:27,132 --> 00:08:30,052 - Okay, come on. What you got? - What's going on? 167 00:08:34,139 --> 00:08:36,058 You're catching up. Don't cut that corner! 168 00:08:36,139 --> 00:08:38,159 Come on. You can't catch me, I'm the gingerbread man. 169 00:08:38,183 --> 00:08:39,524 Faster, boys! 170 00:08:41,730 --> 00:08:43,610 - Look at his face. - Colin, Isaac, please stop. 171 00:08:43,981 --> 00:08:45,662 Yeah, it really hurts now. It really hurts. 172 00:08:45,734 --> 00:08:47,953 Be careful, Colin, now. That's our new coach. 173 00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:49,697 - Oh, right, boyo. - Yeah. 174 00:08:49,779 --> 00:08:50,950 Sorry, gaffer. 175 00:08:52,073 --> 00:08:53,084 Thank you. 176 00:08:56,912 --> 00:08:59,251 Okay, way to run out there today, fellas. 177 00:08:59,331 --> 00:09:01,211 You guys are much faster than me. 178 00:09:01,875 --> 00:09:02,875 Except Coach Beard. 179 00:09:02,960 --> 00:09:05,230 What's going on? I thought you ran track in high school or something. 180 00:09:05,254 --> 00:09:06,264 Chess team, Coach. 181 00:09:06,337 --> 00:09:07,508 Illinois State Champs, baby. 182 00:09:07,589 --> 00:09:09,379 Okay, yeah. Illinois is a state, fellas. 183 00:09:09,466 --> 00:09:12,296 One last thing, there are some gifts up in y'all's lockers. 184 00:09:12,385 --> 00:09:14,806 In your little cubbies up there. So, hope you enjoy 'em. 185 00:09:28,568 --> 00:09:29,899 It's a fucking book. 186 00:09:40,581 --> 00:09:41,711 Nice one, bitch boy. 187 00:09:48,337 --> 00:09:50,258 - Hey. - Yeah, I just thought you should know 188 00:09:50,340 --> 00:09:52,929 that your boy Nathan's being harassed every single day 189 00:09:53,009 --> 00:09:56,009 by Jamie and his little... side-pricks. 190 00:09:56,721 --> 00:09:58,351 - Right. - So you know already? 191 00:09:58,432 --> 00:09:59,471 Yep. 192 00:09:59,557 --> 00:10:01,138 So, you'll take care of it? 193 00:10:01,225 --> 00:10:02,306 No. 194 00:10:03,687 --> 00:10:04,767 What the fuck? 195 00:10:04,855 --> 00:10:07,815 Roy, I learned two pretty big lessons 196 00:10:07,899 --> 00:10:10,820 on the rough-and-tumble playgrounds of Brookridge Elementary School. 197 00:10:11,485 --> 00:10:14,485 One, if little Ronnie Fowch offers you a candy bar, 198 00:10:14,572 --> 00:10:17,082 you immediately say no, and you get the hell outta there. 199 00:10:17,658 --> 00:10:18,908 'Cause there's a good chance 200 00:10:18,994 --> 00:10:22,124 that little son of a gun has just pooped inside of a Butterfinger wrapper. 201 00:10:22,831 --> 00:10:25,211 No one ever saw him do it, but a couple people ate it. 202 00:10:25,292 --> 00:10:28,422 Number two, if the teacher tells the bully not to pick on someone, 203 00:10:28,504 --> 00:10:29,844 it's just gonna make it worse. 204 00:10:29,922 --> 00:10:31,381 So, you're not gonna do anything? 205 00:10:32,216 --> 00:10:33,336 No. 206 00:10:39,222 --> 00:10:40,432 Why you winding him up? 207 00:10:41,140 --> 00:10:42,181 He's the one, Coach. 208 00:10:42,267 --> 00:10:44,307 If we're gonna make an impact here, 209 00:10:44,394 --> 00:10:47,653 the first domino that needs to fall is right inside that man's heart. 210 00:10:57,615 --> 00:10:58,615 Yes. 211 00:11:00,034 --> 00:11:03,745 - Jamie, can I ask you something? - It's 40 kilos. I do three sets of ten. 212 00:11:04,331 --> 00:11:08,791 And then I alternate between bis and tris. 213 00:11:08,876 --> 00:11:11,456 I don't give a shit what you lift, you little pretty boy. 214 00:11:11,547 --> 00:11:13,216 Yeah, you do, 'cause you asked. 215 00:11:14,216 --> 00:11:15,546 Can you curl 40 kilos? 216 00:11:15,634 --> 00:11:17,514 No, but I can use your balls as a speed bag. 217 00:11:17,594 --> 00:11:19,724 - Do you wanna try that? - Not especially. 218 00:11:20,429 --> 00:11:22,616 Do you even understand the influence you have on this team? 219 00:11:22,640 --> 00:11:24,480 - I'm the shit, yeah. - No, you're a bellend. 220 00:11:24,559 --> 00:11:28,059 But because your right foot was kissed by God the boys look up to you. 221 00:11:28,145 --> 00:11:29,686 It's made me question my own faith. 222 00:11:30,190 --> 00:11:31,480 So, when they pick on Nate... 223 00:11:33,150 --> 00:11:34,280 and you laugh... 224 00:11:34,820 --> 00:11:35,820 Yeah. 225 00:11:35,903 --> 00:11:37,453 They think it's okay. 226 00:11:37,530 --> 00:11:41,290 Right, 'cause Nate's a weak baby and he can't do anything about it. 227 00:11:46,248 --> 00:11:48,748 Yeah, all right. I'll take care of it. Nate's a good lad. 228 00:11:49,168 --> 00:11:50,248 Good. 229 00:11:51,669 --> 00:11:52,980 Hey, Roy. You comin' to the club tonight? 230 00:11:53,004 --> 00:11:54,205 Hold on, will you be there? 231 00:11:54,298 --> 00:11:56,378 - Of course, bruv. - Then fuck no. 232 00:11:57,926 --> 00:11:59,505 Colin, Isaac, come here. 233 00:12:01,053 --> 00:12:02,907 You know how you two are always messing with Nate? 234 00:12:02,931 --> 00:12:04,100 - Yeah. - Yeah. 235 00:12:07,769 --> 00:12:09,269 Keep it up. Makes me laugh. 236 00:12:17,278 --> 00:12:19,399 - Good morning, Higgins. - Good morning. I was just... 237 00:12:19,447 --> 00:12:21,908 Waiting at the entrance so I'd see you were here on time. 238 00:12:21,991 --> 00:12:24,241 Exactly. You seem in good spirits. 239 00:12:24,327 --> 00:12:26,908 Yes, I am. I've just realized something. 240 00:12:26,996 --> 00:12:28,917 Who cares if we can't run that picture? 241 00:12:28,999 --> 00:12:30,879 The bigger issue is that the local community 242 00:12:30,958 --> 00:12:33,418 is getting behind the team no matter how badly they play. 243 00:12:34,546 --> 00:12:36,375 It is an outstanding fan base. 244 00:12:36,465 --> 00:12:39,004 Yes, one I believe I can put an end to. 245 00:12:39,091 --> 00:12:40,091 Hooray. 246 00:12:40,885 --> 00:12:42,096 No. 247 00:12:42,178 --> 00:12:44,139 Okay. I'll go back there. 248 00:12:44,222 --> 00:12:46,273 - Here you go. - Thank you. 249 00:12:46,350 --> 00:12:48,559 So, I spoke to the owner of The Sun. 250 00:12:48,644 --> 00:12:49,854 You spoke to God? 251 00:12:50,479 --> 00:12:51,859 - No, the newspaper. - Oh, right. 252 00:12:51,938 --> 00:12:55,528 And he has agreed to not run the photo of you and Keeley. 253 00:12:56,150 --> 00:13:00,160 MVP! MVP! MVP! 254 00:13:00,239 --> 00:13:02,408 - Left leg! Right leg, not as good! - Okay. 255 00:13:02,490 --> 00:13:04,081 - Yeah! - Yes. Okay, thank you, Ted. 256 00:13:04,158 --> 00:13:05,839 Sorry. Yeah, no. You were saying. Go ahead. 257 00:13:05,910 --> 00:13:06,910 In exchange, 258 00:13:06,995 --> 00:13:10,365 I've agreed for his more reputable newspaper, The Independent, 259 00:13:10,456 --> 00:13:11,956 to do a profile on you. 260 00:13:12,042 --> 00:13:13,341 "One-on-One with Coach Lasso." 261 00:13:13,418 --> 00:13:14,498 Yeah, okay. 262 00:13:14,586 --> 00:13:16,375 The writer will be Trent Crimm. 263 00:13:17,213 --> 00:13:20,224 And he's very good, and the supporters really listen to him. 264 00:13:20,299 --> 00:13:22,679 Oh, no. I know Trent, yeah. He's a tough cookie. 265 00:13:22,760 --> 00:13:24,971 - Really? - Yeah, but that's okay. 266 00:13:25,054 --> 00:13:26,615 You know what you do with tough cookies, don't ya? 267 00:13:26,639 --> 00:13:29,019 - No. - Dip 'em in milk. 268 00:13:30,394 --> 00:13:32,104 All right, let's run that new one. 269 00:13:36,482 --> 00:13:37,822 Hey, there he is. 270 00:13:37,900 --> 00:13:39,860 Hello, Coach Ted Lasso from America. 271 00:13:39,945 --> 00:13:42,274 Hello, Trent Crimm from The Independent. 272 00:13:42,364 --> 00:13:44,384 Hey, excited to spend the day with ya. Gonna be fun. 273 00:13:44,408 --> 00:13:45,778 And please, call me Ted. 274 00:13:46,784 --> 00:13:48,034 All right, let's go! 275 00:13:53,875 --> 00:13:54,956 Wide open. 276 00:13:55,043 --> 00:13:56,633 - Yeah! - Snuck it by him. 277 00:14:03,467 --> 00:14:04,967 Thataway, Sammy. How'd that feel? 278 00:14:05,052 --> 00:14:07,682 Oh, wonderful, Coach. I felt that one in my penis. 279 00:14:07,764 --> 00:14:09,701 Yeah. No, that sounds about right. That's good. Yeah. 280 00:14:09,725 --> 00:14:12,225 Hey, Jamie, you gotta sell that run-through hard, baby. 281 00:14:12,311 --> 00:14:14,038 Make the defense believe you. Watch, like this. 282 00:14:14,062 --> 00:14:15,611 Ball! Ball! Give me the ball! 283 00:14:15,688 --> 00:14:18,528 I want the ball! Give me the ball! I would like the ball, please! 284 00:14:18,609 --> 00:14:19,609 Make it a performance. 285 00:14:19,692 --> 00:14:21,952 I want you winning an Oscar at the ESPYs next year. 286 00:14:22,028 --> 00:14:23,359 You want me to run decoy? 287 00:14:23,447 --> 00:14:24,447 Yeah, that's right. 288 00:14:24,489 --> 00:14:25,489 It's a joke. 289 00:14:25,948 --> 00:14:28,448 Unfortunately for you, though, no one thinks it's funny. 290 00:14:28,534 --> 00:14:29,534 That true? 291 00:14:29,912 --> 00:14:32,162 Agree to disagree. I find it hilarious. 292 00:14:32,246 --> 00:14:33,600 I thought it was funnier than Step Brothers. 293 00:14:33,624 --> 00:14:34,624 High praise. 294 00:14:35,000 --> 00:14:36,789 That scene where the bunk bed collapses... 295 00:14:37,211 --> 00:14:39,491 I used to think that was the funniest thing I'd ever seen, 296 00:14:39,546 --> 00:14:40,546 but then I just saw that. 297 00:14:40,630 --> 00:14:42,692 And now I'm gonna have to rethink my order of what I think is 298 00:14:42,716 --> 00:14:43,902 the funniest thing I've ever seen. 299 00:14:43,926 --> 00:14:47,216 Yeah, that's when sports and art combine, as far as I'm concerned. 300 00:14:47,303 --> 00:14:49,157 All right, fellas, let's run it again. Let's go. 301 00:14:49,181 --> 00:14:50,181 Cheers. 302 00:14:51,475 --> 00:14:53,235 Yeah, they're getting it. They're getting it. 303 00:14:53,268 --> 00:14:55,398 Interesting play, Ted. Did you come up with this? 304 00:14:55,479 --> 00:14:56,479 Oh, no, no, no. 305 00:14:56,562 --> 00:14:58,732 This is all cooked up by our very own Nate the Great. 306 00:14:59,357 --> 00:15:00,477 Who's "Nate the Great"? 307 00:15:01,442 --> 00:15:02,442 Oh, yeah. There he is. 308 00:15:03,153 --> 00:15:05,783 Someone's been walking their dog here. Found another poo. 309 00:15:06,322 --> 00:15:07,322 Okay. 310 00:15:08,115 --> 00:15:09,985 What exactly does "Nate the Great" do? 311 00:15:10,494 --> 00:15:11,971 I'm not exactly sure what his title is. 312 00:15:11,995 --> 00:15:13,639 Hey, Coach. What is Nate's job around here? 313 00:15:13,663 --> 00:15:15,423 - Kit man. - There you go. Kit man. 314 00:15:16,542 --> 00:15:19,461 Do you mean to tell me you're entrusting a Premier League team's attack 315 00:15:19,544 --> 00:15:20,544 to the kit man? 316 00:15:20,586 --> 00:15:23,191 That young fellow's forgotten more about this sport than I'll ever know. 317 00:15:23,215 --> 00:15:25,335 Heck, might be a genius. 318 00:15:25,424 --> 00:15:26,674 Anything to add, Coach? 319 00:15:26,759 --> 00:15:27,759 Good kid. 320 00:15:29,346 --> 00:15:30,346 Boy, oh boy. 321 00:15:30,429 --> 00:15:32,283 If you knew Coach Beard, you'd know what a big deal that was. 322 00:15:32,307 --> 00:15:33,427 You mean that, don't you? 323 00:15:35,059 --> 00:15:36,620 Well, hell. There's your story right there. 324 00:15:36,644 --> 00:15:39,644 Got a headline and everything. "Man Nods Head." 325 00:15:39,730 --> 00:15:40,860 Watch your back, Gay Talese. 326 00:15:40,941 --> 00:15:44,990 There's a new iconic profile about to be typed up by one Trent Crimm. 327 00:15:45,070 --> 00:15:46,450 Tighten up those lines! 328 00:15:47,280 --> 00:15:48,370 Let 'em know, Coach. 329 00:15:50,783 --> 00:15:51,793 Come on. 330 00:15:52,995 --> 00:15:53,995 Get a towel. 331 00:15:54,078 --> 00:15:55,999 - Oh, God. No, no, no. - Get a towel. 332 00:15:56,081 --> 00:15:59,040 - Let go. Please, God. Stop it. No. - Oi, oi! 333 00:15:59,125 --> 00:16:00,625 What the fuck are you doing? 334 00:16:01,419 --> 00:16:03,220 Jamie not talk to you about leaving him alone? 335 00:16:07,176 --> 00:16:08,836 Fuck's sake. 336 00:16:17,977 --> 00:16:20,164 - You look like you've forgotten something. - Hi, Keeley. 337 00:16:20,188 --> 00:16:23,000 I'm looking for your prick boyfriend. You know how to pick 'em, don't ya? 338 00:16:23,024 --> 00:16:26,815 Didn't your last girlfriend steal your Rolex and sell it for drug money? 339 00:16:26,903 --> 00:16:29,494 So? I don't need a phone and a watch. 340 00:16:30,282 --> 00:16:32,871 Look, I didn't sign up to be your boyfriend's minder, okay? 341 00:16:32,951 --> 00:16:35,790 But the new gaffer's trying to make me feel responsible 342 00:16:35,870 --> 00:16:39,370 for fucking Nate, whose last name I don't even know. 343 00:16:39,457 --> 00:16:40,628 It's Barnes. 344 00:16:40,709 --> 00:16:41,749 No. It's Shelley. 345 00:16:41,835 --> 00:16:42,835 Yeah, I know. 346 00:16:42,919 --> 00:16:44,210 I don't like being tricked. 347 00:16:44,296 --> 00:16:48,125 Not by you and not by, "Howdy y'all, cowboys. 348 00:16:48,216 --> 00:16:51,136 My name is Ted Lasso and I'm from Kansas." 349 00:16:53,514 --> 00:16:56,183 Wow, you're, like, really, really bad at impressions, man. 350 00:16:56,265 --> 00:17:01,225 I know he's trying to push my buttons, but I cannot be manipulated. 351 00:17:01,312 --> 00:17:04,323 Come on. I could push all of your buttons right now if I wanted to. 352 00:17:04,397 --> 00:17:06,335 - No, you couldn't, Keeley... - I think, actually, I could. 353 00:17:06,358 --> 00:17:08,587 - You couldn't, Keeley... No, Keeley. - What was that? I can't seem to hear you. 354 00:17:08,612 --> 00:17:10,797 - Keeley, if you would listen to me... - I'm trying to listen to you. 355 00:17:10,820 --> 00:17:12,260 - I could tell you why... - So tell me. 356 00:17:13,031 --> 00:17:14,701 Is that making you mad? 357 00:17:15,617 --> 00:17:16,617 No. 358 00:17:17,578 --> 00:17:18,578 No. 359 00:17:21,708 --> 00:17:26,087 "I'm Roy Kent and I get paid to play a game, 360 00:17:26,171 --> 00:17:28,421 but I'm mad all the time." 361 00:17:34,179 --> 00:17:35,429 That's actually pretty good. 362 00:17:43,814 --> 00:17:45,074 Hey, Trent. 363 00:17:45,147 --> 00:17:47,397 - You know who you remind me of right now? - No. Who? 364 00:17:47,483 --> 00:17:48,993 One of them robot vacuums. 365 00:17:49,987 --> 00:17:51,817 Just kinda wandering around looking for dirt. 366 00:17:51,904 --> 00:17:53,565 - Roomba. - That's the one. 367 00:17:54,282 --> 00:17:55,833 Actually, I have a question. 368 00:17:55,909 --> 00:17:57,868 After your resounding loss to Crystal Palace, 369 00:17:57,952 --> 00:18:00,712 one of your players said there was a party in the locker room. 370 00:18:00,788 --> 00:18:03,828 Do you feel it sends the right message having a party after a loss? 371 00:18:04,960 --> 00:18:08,380 Well, Trent, I've never really concerned myself too much with wins and losses. 372 00:18:08,462 --> 00:18:10,512 Now that's a quote I'll probably use. 373 00:18:10,590 --> 00:18:11,590 You should get going. 374 00:18:12,217 --> 00:18:13,944 Hey, will you let Roy know we're heading out soon? 375 00:18:13,969 --> 00:18:15,219 - Copy. - Thanks, Coach. 376 00:18:15,304 --> 00:18:18,473 You wanna tag along? We're gonna go speak to some schoolkids. 377 00:18:18,557 --> 00:18:20,057 Oh, what a coincidence. 378 00:18:20,142 --> 00:18:23,271 The day of our interview you just happen to be visiting a local school. 379 00:18:23,353 --> 00:18:25,732 Well, that's the funny thing about coincidences, ain't it? 380 00:18:26,522 --> 00:18:27,823 Sometimes they just happen. 381 00:18:28,733 --> 00:18:29,903 Come on now. 382 00:18:31,737 --> 00:18:32,567 Come in. 383 00:18:32,653 --> 00:18:35,993 I just wanted to come and thank you again for stopping that picture from running. 384 00:18:36,575 --> 00:18:37,825 And I bought you a present. 385 00:18:42,288 --> 00:18:43,419 Made me think of you. 386 00:18:44,374 --> 00:18:45,923 It's strong and a bit prickly. 387 00:18:49,253 --> 00:18:51,413 You know, I've decided to not be scared of you anymore. 388 00:18:51,714 --> 00:18:52,835 I didn't know you were. 389 00:18:52,924 --> 00:18:54,884 Yeah. I was, like, fucking terrified of you. 390 00:18:54,968 --> 00:18:57,677 My God, Jamie would have been so pissed off 391 00:18:57,762 --> 00:19:00,063 with reporters poking around in our love life. 392 00:19:01,098 --> 00:19:03,536 I don't know why I'm telling you. You know all about that, don't you? 393 00:19:03,559 --> 00:19:05,059 Remember when you got divorced? 394 00:19:05,561 --> 00:19:06,692 It rings a bell. 395 00:19:06,771 --> 00:19:08,731 Yeah, I mean, didn't it, like, make you really mad 396 00:19:08,773 --> 00:19:10,443 that they went after you and not Rupert? 397 00:19:10,526 --> 00:19:13,212 'Cause he was the one that cheated and he came across like Prince Charming. 398 00:19:13,237 --> 00:19:15,527 It really pissed me off. 399 00:19:16,448 --> 00:19:18,907 Well, the press are never awful to men. 400 00:19:19,451 --> 00:19:22,621 No one ever pays a fortune for a photo of a naked man on a yacht in Mallorca 401 00:19:22,703 --> 00:19:23,913 a week after his divorce. 402 00:19:23,997 --> 00:19:26,247 That's like a very specific scenario. 403 00:19:26,333 --> 00:19:28,962 Oh, my God. That means there's a picture of you naked on a yacht. 404 00:19:29,044 --> 00:19:30,044 Can I see it? Is it here? 405 00:19:30,086 --> 00:19:33,336 Come on. You wouldn't have said something if you weren't dying to show someone. 406 00:19:33,882 --> 00:19:34,882 Please. 407 00:19:37,009 --> 00:19:40,390 It was taken from a helicopter while I was sunbathing. 408 00:19:42,057 --> 00:19:44,136 Holy shit, Rebecca. 409 00:19:44,684 --> 00:19:46,055 Are those your real tits? 410 00:19:46,144 --> 00:19:48,523 I feel like a teenage boy. I can't stop staring at them. 411 00:19:48,605 --> 00:19:50,355 Where did you get those? 412 00:19:50,440 --> 00:19:51,529 My mum. 413 00:19:51,607 --> 00:19:53,407 I can't believe you stopped this from running. 414 00:19:53,442 --> 00:19:54,742 I would have shown everyone. 415 00:19:54,819 --> 00:19:57,660 Right. I really need to get on. 416 00:19:58,490 --> 00:19:59,779 Oh, sorry. Yeah. 417 00:20:00,241 --> 00:20:01,241 Thank you. 418 00:20:04,913 --> 00:20:05,962 Bye. 419 00:20:06,707 --> 00:20:07,707 Shoes. 420 00:20:08,541 --> 00:20:10,251 Shoes. Yes. 421 00:20:11,711 --> 00:20:13,211 Wow, you really blew my brains out 422 00:20:13,297 --> 00:20:15,257 with those beautiful breasts of yours, Rebecca. 423 00:20:30,521 --> 00:20:32,862 When I first saw our school football squad, 424 00:20:33,608 --> 00:20:36,818 I didn't think that Richmond Primary would win a single game, 425 00:20:37,403 --> 00:20:39,784 much less the league championship. 426 00:20:48,664 --> 00:20:53,204 To celebrate, please welcome the new manager of AFC Richmond, 427 00:20:53,295 --> 00:20:54,795 Ed Lasso. 428 00:20:57,298 --> 00:20:58,798 Thank you. I appreciate you. 429 00:20:58,884 --> 00:21:01,223 All right. Hey, gang. How y'all doing? 430 00:21:02,179 --> 00:21:04,009 - Wanker. - Jacob. 431 00:21:05,766 --> 00:21:06,846 It's all right. 432 00:21:07,476 --> 00:21:08,806 Look, I just wanted to come down 433 00:21:08,894 --> 00:21:11,023 and congratulate y'all on a heck of a season. 434 00:21:11,104 --> 00:21:14,273 But hey, I know someone else who's really excited to meet all of ya. 435 00:21:14,357 --> 00:21:15,938 So if you please help me welcome 436 00:21:16,026 --> 00:21:19,855 the captain of your AFC Richmond squad, Roy Kent. 437 00:21:22,406 --> 00:21:25,237 Roy! Roy! Roy! Roy! 438 00:21:25,786 --> 00:21:26,786 Right. 439 00:21:27,496 --> 00:21:32,076 Never been much for public speaking or school, really. 440 00:21:32,792 --> 00:21:34,593 Always seemed like a waste of time to me. 441 00:21:39,007 --> 00:21:41,257 Why don't we get out of this stuffy auditorium, 442 00:21:41,343 --> 00:21:43,472 go out on the pitch and have a proper fuck-about? 443 00:21:56,066 --> 00:21:57,816 I think it's really cool you do this. 444 00:21:57,901 --> 00:21:59,951 Only doing it 'cause my fucking niece goes here. 445 00:22:00,028 --> 00:22:02,607 - Oh, yeah? Which one is she? - That idiot. 446 00:22:06,285 --> 00:22:07,535 Oh boy, here she comes. 447 00:22:08,287 --> 00:22:09,616 Can we do headers, Uncle Roy? 448 00:22:09,704 --> 00:22:10,994 Yeah, all right. Come on then. 449 00:22:12,124 --> 00:22:13,794 All right. Come on, you lot. Line up. 450 00:22:13,875 --> 00:22:15,746 Heads. Lovely. 451 00:22:15,836 --> 00:22:17,546 Next. Go. Perfect. 452 00:22:17,628 --> 00:22:19,169 Next. Heads. 453 00:22:19,839 --> 00:22:20,839 Next. 454 00:22:23,384 --> 00:22:24,795 Well done. Next. 455 00:22:28,222 --> 00:22:30,563 Next. Sweet. 456 00:22:30,976 --> 00:22:32,056 Lovely. I liked it. 457 00:22:33,936 --> 00:22:35,186 - Good. - Roy, come on. 458 00:22:35,271 --> 00:22:37,125 You hop in there, show 'em how it's done. I'll do a couple. 459 00:22:37,148 --> 00:22:38,439 How you doing? Ready? Come on. 460 00:22:38,525 --> 00:22:40,025 That's the spot. Come on. 461 00:22:40,109 --> 00:22:42,240 Here we go, Phoebe. Let's see what you got. 462 00:22:42,320 --> 00:22:44,280 Hey, nice catch. We might have ourselves a goalie. 463 00:22:45,240 --> 00:22:47,279 Boy, oh boy. That was right in the button. 464 00:22:48,785 --> 00:22:49,785 Good job, Phoebe. 465 00:22:54,790 --> 00:22:56,421 Oh boy. 466 00:22:56,501 --> 00:22:57,922 Sorry about the blood there. 467 00:22:59,421 --> 00:23:00,421 There you go. 468 00:23:00,506 --> 00:23:01,756 Don't use it to clone me. 469 00:23:01,839 --> 00:23:04,049 Nice meeting you. Take care now. 470 00:23:05,259 --> 00:23:07,779 That's the longest anyone's ever stayed for something like this. 471 00:23:07,846 --> 00:23:09,596 - Hey, thanks for having us. - Cheers. 472 00:23:09,681 --> 00:23:10,681 Thanks again. 473 00:23:12,017 --> 00:23:13,186 Roy, that was a blast. 474 00:23:13,268 --> 00:23:15,788 And I tell you what, that niece of yours is a real cutie patootie. 475 00:23:15,811 --> 00:23:19,902 Enough. I've had it with your mind games and your stupid gifts. 476 00:23:19,982 --> 00:23:22,403 I mean, what even is A Wrinkle in Time? 477 00:23:22,486 --> 00:23:24,105 It's a lovely novel. 478 00:23:24,195 --> 00:23:27,236 It's the story of a young girl's struggle with the burden of leadership 479 00:23:27,324 --> 00:23:28,663 as she journeys through space. 480 00:23:29,617 --> 00:23:30,617 Yeah. That's it. 481 00:23:32,203 --> 00:23:33,794 Am I supposed to be the little girl? 482 00:23:34,330 --> 00:23:35,421 I'd like you to be. 483 00:23:36,375 --> 00:23:38,164 Right. None of this matters. 484 00:23:38,251 --> 00:23:40,438 'Cause I'm just doing what everyone in this town is doing, 485 00:23:40,461 --> 00:23:42,382 and I'm counting down the days until you're gone. 486 00:23:42,463 --> 00:23:44,544 Trent, you're a colossal prick. You always have been. 487 00:23:46,259 --> 00:23:47,509 Phoebe, come on. 488 00:23:53,599 --> 00:23:54,599 Are you hungry? 489 00:23:56,019 --> 00:23:57,019 Little tradition. 490 00:23:59,480 --> 00:24:01,070 Let battle commence. 491 00:24:01,525 --> 00:24:02,724 Ted Lasso? 492 00:24:02,817 --> 00:24:05,198 - Hey there, Ollie. - Leave it out. What are you doing here? 493 00:24:05,278 --> 00:24:06,798 Well, I mean, you invited me, remember? 494 00:24:06,821 --> 00:24:08,821 I invite every person who's been in my car. 495 00:24:08,906 --> 00:24:11,366 Hey, Ollie. This is my friend Trent. 496 00:24:11,451 --> 00:24:13,555 - Trent, this is my buddy Ollie. - Pleased to meet you. 497 00:24:13,578 --> 00:24:15,788 Congrats. You both just met a cool person. 498 00:24:16,330 --> 00:24:18,131 Right, gentlemen. You know what you're having? 499 00:24:18,625 --> 00:24:20,561 Yeah. Well, you know, whatever the chef recommends. 500 00:24:20,586 --> 00:24:24,046 That would be my father-in-law. Are you okay with a little bit of spice? 501 00:24:24,131 --> 00:24:26,730 Have him make it for us like we're a couple members of the family. 502 00:24:27,049 --> 00:24:28,140 You're a brave man. 503 00:24:31,137 --> 00:24:33,018 Oh, man. Mad respect. 504 00:24:33,097 --> 00:24:35,268 That might not be the wisest of choices. 505 00:24:36,727 --> 00:24:37,977 Here you go, boys. 506 00:24:38,895 --> 00:24:40,145 - Dig in. - Can't wait. 507 00:24:40,230 --> 00:24:42,319 The smell's already deep inside my brain. 508 00:24:42,398 --> 00:24:44,939 - Gonna love it. - I appreciate it. 509 00:24:45,027 --> 00:24:47,737 I can't imagine they have good Indian food in Kansas. 510 00:24:47,820 --> 00:24:50,371 I have no idea. I've never had Indian food. 511 00:25:02,126 --> 00:25:03,707 Wow, that... I mean, that's hot. 512 00:25:03,795 --> 00:25:06,835 Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy. Feel like I'm about to breathe fire. 513 00:25:08,842 --> 00:25:10,001 I don't think I can eat that. 514 00:25:10,801 --> 00:25:13,071 What? No, no, no. Come on now. We gotta put a decent dent in this, 515 00:25:13,096 --> 00:25:15,496 otherwise we're gonna embarrass Ollie in front of his family. 516 00:25:15,932 --> 00:25:19,063 - No, really, I can't. - Come on, just dump it on my plate. 517 00:25:21,020 --> 00:25:22,651 Yeah, yeah. You're good. 518 00:25:22,730 --> 00:25:25,320 So, if you love Kansas so much, why did you... 519 00:25:26,108 --> 00:25:30,199 Why did you leave to coach a sport you can barely... you know anything about? 520 00:25:30,279 --> 00:25:31,279 Was it just the money? 521 00:25:31,865 --> 00:25:33,575 Wait, I'm supposed to be getting paid? 522 00:25:33,659 --> 00:25:34,828 Are you enjoying the food? 523 00:25:35,285 --> 00:25:37,115 Tell your father-in-law it's perfect. 524 00:25:37,663 --> 00:25:39,083 Dad! He says it's perfect! 525 00:25:41,040 --> 00:25:43,790 Ted. What you're doing is irresponsible. 526 00:25:44,252 --> 00:25:46,262 This club actually means something to this town. 527 00:25:46,838 --> 00:25:47,878 I know that. 528 00:25:47,964 --> 00:25:48,964 I do. 529 00:25:49,590 --> 00:25:51,131 Trent, what do you love? 530 00:25:53,220 --> 00:25:54,220 Is it writing? 531 00:25:55,388 --> 00:25:56,219 - Yes. - Yeah. 532 00:25:56,306 --> 00:25:57,986 Well, good, 'cause you're darn good at it. 533 00:25:58,224 --> 00:25:59,424 - Thank you. - You're welcome. 534 00:25:59,518 --> 00:26:01,438 Me? I love coaching. 535 00:26:02,019 --> 00:26:03,180 Now, I'm gonna say this again 536 00:26:03,230 --> 00:26:05,834 just so you didn't think it was a mistake the first time I said it. 537 00:26:05,857 --> 00:26:08,028 For me, success is not about the wins and losses. 538 00:26:08,609 --> 00:26:11,338 It's about helping these young fellas be the best versions of themselves 539 00:26:11,363 --> 00:26:12,363 on and off the field. 540 00:26:12,865 --> 00:26:14,275 And it ain't always easy, Trent, 541 00:26:14,365 --> 00:26:18,036 but neither is growing up without someone believing in you. 542 00:26:19,704 --> 00:26:20,825 Let me ask you this. 543 00:26:21,874 --> 00:26:23,544 Is my tongue still in my mouth? 544 00:26:23,625 --> 00:26:26,035 'Cause I am about to hallucinate from all the heat here. 545 00:26:29,047 --> 00:26:30,047 I really should go. 546 00:26:31,174 --> 00:26:33,545 - Deadlines and all. - Hey, gotta do the work. 547 00:26:33,634 --> 00:26:34,884 Hey, I'll say this though. 548 00:26:34,970 --> 00:26:37,329 I really enjoyed getting to spend this time with you, Trent. 549 00:26:38,265 --> 00:26:39,625 You actually mean that, don't you? 550 00:26:39,892 --> 00:26:40,892 Yeah. 551 00:26:41,894 --> 00:26:42,894 Yeah. 552 00:26:44,188 --> 00:26:45,557 - Thank you. - You're welcome. 553 00:26:46,105 --> 00:26:47,105 You all right? 554 00:26:48,025 --> 00:26:50,025 Normally, one dish is plenty, 555 00:26:50,109 --> 00:26:52,779 but we know how you Americans like to eat, innit? 556 00:26:53,404 --> 00:26:54,404 Let's do it, huh? 557 00:26:55,449 --> 00:26:56,578 Try that one. 558 00:27:03,373 --> 00:27:06,133 - Beautiful, right? - It's beyond beautiful. It's hot. 559 00:27:08,836 --> 00:27:10,876 "Mrs. Which's voice was grave. 560 00:27:11,673 --> 00:27:13,182 'What do you understand?' 561 00:27:14,050 --> 00:27:15,471 'That it has to be me. 562 00:27:16,303 --> 00:27:17,762 Can't be anyone else.'" 563 00:27:22,267 --> 00:27:23,346 Fuck! 564 00:27:24,144 --> 00:27:26,153 That's a bad word, Uncle Roy. 565 00:27:26,230 --> 00:27:27,900 Mind your own business, Phoebe. 566 00:27:32,277 --> 00:27:33,277 Be good. 567 00:27:40,786 --> 00:27:43,996 - Yes? - I have an advance copy of the article. 568 00:27:45,582 --> 00:27:48,632 - Read it to me. - Title: "Wayward Ted." 569 00:27:49,336 --> 00:27:52,415 "Whatever you think of Ted Lasso as a football coach, 570 00:27:52,506 --> 00:27:56,215 I assure you, the truth is harder to swallow." 571 00:27:56,300 --> 00:27:59,010 - Hey, how you doing? - Good. How's your nose, Coach? 572 00:27:59,096 --> 00:28:01,324 - It's fine. Thank you for asking. - "And swallow you must, 573 00:28:01,347 --> 00:28:04,057 because Ted is out there in the community 574 00:28:04,142 --> 00:28:07,862 either bravely or stupidly facing the music." 575 00:28:07,938 --> 00:28:10,083 - Hey, fellas. How you doing? - "That's for you to decide." 576 00:28:10,106 --> 00:28:11,856 Piss off, wanker! 577 00:28:13,818 --> 00:28:15,398 - Hi. - Yeah. 578 00:28:15,487 --> 00:28:17,027 - Stop it. - Every time. 579 00:28:17,114 --> 00:28:19,413 "And yes, he's in over his head. 580 00:28:19,490 --> 00:28:23,701 He insisted twice that he didn't care if Richmond won or lost. 581 00:28:23,787 --> 00:28:28,247 But if the Lasso way is wrong, it's hard to imagine being right." 582 00:28:30,794 --> 00:28:32,134 Why have you stopped reading? 583 00:28:33,297 --> 00:28:37,176 Please do me the favor of remembering that these aren't my words, it's Trent Crimm. 584 00:28:38,050 --> 00:28:39,050 Keep going. 585 00:28:40,261 --> 00:28:42,511 -"In a business that celebrates ego, - celebrates ego, 586 00:28:42,597 --> 00:28:44,032 - Ted reins his in." - Ted reins his in. 587 00:28:44,057 --> 00:28:48,477 His coaching style is subtle. It never hits you over the head. 588 00:28:48,561 --> 00:28:51,612 Hello, Roy. I didn't know it was a retirement party. 589 00:28:53,817 --> 00:28:54,817 Shit! 590 00:28:55,318 --> 00:28:56,568 Stop messing with Nate! 591 00:28:57,320 --> 00:28:58,839 Now, I don't know which one of you I nutted, 592 00:28:58,864 --> 00:29:00,299 'cause I don't see so well at night anymore, 593 00:29:00,324 --> 00:29:01,483 but that goes for all of you! 594 00:29:02,159 --> 00:29:05,999 Slowly growing until you can no longer ignore its presence. 595 00:29:06,913 --> 00:29:08,084 Vanilla vodka. 596 00:29:09,290 --> 00:29:10,290 Such a child. 597 00:29:12,669 --> 00:29:13,798 Keeley. 598 00:29:13,878 --> 00:29:14,878 Roy. 599 00:29:15,506 --> 00:29:18,336 Whether that means allowing followers to become leaders, 600 00:29:20,093 --> 00:29:23,313 or in a show of respect, eating food so spicy 601 00:29:23,387 --> 00:29:26,557 it's sure to wreak massive havoc on his intestinal system. 602 00:29:26,642 --> 00:29:27,942 Keys, keys, keys. 603 00:29:28,018 --> 00:29:30,018 Okay, here we go. Oh boy. Oh boy. 604 00:29:30,103 --> 00:29:32,772 And though I believe that Ted Lasso will fail here 605 00:29:32,855 --> 00:29:35,895 and Richmond will suffer the embarrassment of relegation, 606 00:29:37,027 --> 00:29:38,856 I won't gloat when it happens. 607 00:29:40,029 --> 00:29:42,069 Because I can't help but root for him. 608 00:29:43,700 --> 00:29:45,329 Fuck!